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"motherhood"

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Thoughts and New Items

I love to crochet, yet somehow I always forget I do. I can go through months without crocheting and be in a weird funk and when I start crocheting again it disappears. I cut myself off from my own creativity - what is up with that? I think apart of it is not allowing myself to call myself an artist...like I am unworthy of that title. I studied acting for years, was on stage, crocheted as a hobby, but since I have not been acting or trying to pursue Hollywood (no way, no how) I need a creative outlet. It's that simple.

I am a creative person. I am an artist.

Crocheting is just so relaxing and nostalgic to me. It reminds me of my dad's girlfriend; she has been my mama since I was 2. It wasn't until the end of high school and my college years that I started getting more and more closer to her. And we would bond by crocheting. She walked me through granny squares and motifs and gave me good tips and always supplies me with extra hooks and yarn :). Whenever I crochet I think of her and miss her. I live in Southern Cali while they live up north and I won't be seeing them for the holidays this year. So crocheting makes me feel closer to her.

It wasn't until last year I started to seriously consider selling and sharing my work. I love to crochet gifts for my friends and family, but I though I would try my luck with Etsy. However, so many people sell their crochet items already, it is so hard to stand out amidst the beanies and scarves. I have struggled finding my niche with my art, but I feel I have finally found it. 

I am so spiritually inclined and with the evolution of my blog here, I want to make crochet items with spirit at the center of it all. I am in the middle of designing more dream catchers, moon phase bags, tarot/rune bags and more. Not to mention more courses and e-books and other soul works. I am excited for the upcoming year and new chapter of Moondaughter.

With all of that being said, I am finally stocking crochet items in my shop
I am also open to custom orders and requests! Just convo me on Etsy :)

Patchouli Dream Catcher

Athena Dream Catcher

And made-to-order Chakra Flags

I hope everyone has a beautiful, abundant, and Happy Thanksgiving, to those who celebrate it!

I am so grateful for all of you!

Love and Blessings,
Marissa Moondaughter

I have a Black Friday Sale too! Use the code: GRATEFUL to receive 35% off! Ends Friday Night!
I will ship any items out on Monday 11.26 due to the Holiday weekend!

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Mother Days

This is a raw post today for me, so please be gentle with my soul. I kept trying to take a picture of myself, but I had to stop because it was hard to look at the photos. I look so much like my biological mother in this moment, it makes my heart heavy. Instead of avoiding these feelings like I normally do, I am inviting them out into the open; the light of day.


There is not too much to say about my mother because I do not have a relationship with her. I last saw her in 2007 and I have not talked to her in almost two years. I last lived with her when I was 2 or 3 and still remember little snippets from that time. However, she chose to follow a different path than motherhood; a darker, addictive, more dangerous path. I am grateful she did not drag me along, but I know some of my other siblings were not as fortunate.

To say I have abandonment issues is an understatement, and I have struggled with feelings of self-loathing and trust for as long as I can remember. I have overcome a lot, but it is a battle everyday. So these are my Mothering Days, usually triggered by similar stories of sweet innocent babies left by their mothers. I burn inside for the children involved because I have been there. The hours sitting by the window waiting for the mommy who ended up calling and giving a pathetic excuse why she couldn't come over; or simply not calling at all. Not feeling good enough ever. It is such an isolating place to be in and so lonely for a baby.

I know now it was never my fault, it was about her and not me, but it never feels good enough. I think my heart strings will always feel a little twinge and longing for the mother connection that was taken from me in this lifetime. Maybe this is my medicine in this lifetime; to break this cycle if I become a mother one day. IF. I have mothering issues galore.

However, there is a shining light in this story. Growing up with my father, he has been with the same woman since I was 3, and in a way she became my mother. When I was a child it was hard though, it was made very clear I was the "other," so it wasn't until I left the nest and was in college that our relationship grew. It has taken me 22 years to say she is my mother, and it is still hard. Did I say I have trust issues?

They are coming down to visit next week, and I am excited to see her and open up to her. It reminds me of the phrase, "When one door closes, God opens a window..." The window may have been high up, but I can finally reach it. It is time to surrender to what this life has given me and be grateful for this second opportunity of mothering, and just give in.

Thank you for letting me voice these feelings, dear ones.
Lots of love,
Marissa Moondaughter




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